#1: I sleep with my arms around his pillow because it smells like him.
#2: I get up in the middle of the night to plug in his phone which he drowsily forgot to do, so I can text him during the day.
#3: I secrete addictive ingredients in my cooking so he'll keep coming back for meals.
#4: I Facebook stalk him to find out how his projects are going.
#5: I struggle with the desire to dress drop dead gorgeously so he'll find it hard to leave.
#6: I learn to use a dremel tool so I can spend time with my husband.
#7: I do homework in an environment completely foreign to me - the lab - in order to catch a glimpse of him.
#8: I watch X number of old NCIS episodes hoping he'll come home before I fall asleep. (I won't tell you how many - this isn't THAT much of a confession! ;)
#9: I consider falsely telling him I'm pregnant, so I can recover a few moments of the attention his projects stole from me.
#10: I ponder acts of terrorism against the engineering building, specifically, the faculty office wing.
Ah yes. That last week of school, fondly referred to as: Hell Week. Unfortunately, for engineers - and especially for graduate student engineers - Hell Week seems to be a misnomer. Hell Month-and-a-Half seems more suitable even if it is a mouthful.
Finding time to spend together is quite a challenge and creativity is required. I have, in fact, cut out pieces of plastic for one of his projects (but between you and me, there's pretty much no talking to him at all when he gets fixated on an engineering problem) and he has, in fact, come grocery shopping with me as a "homework break." A few lunch dates here and there, and that should be enough to tide me over until graduation, right?
Wrong. Call me greedy if you like, but I can't help wanting to spend more time with my husband. Though I am immensely grateful for the time I do get with him, there's no one I would rather be with in my copious amounts of spare time.
Happily, graduation is only a week and a half away, so things should be looking up soon!
However, as I pity-partied myself to sleep last night, I was suddenly struck by the broader spiritual implications of my behavior. I'll be honest, for many weeks I've hogged Allen's mornings with frivolous conversation or having necessary conversations or cuddling instead of reading God's Word with him. I wonder how often God wants to do something in our lives so we'll
remember to spend the time we should and need to spend with Him. Is there something He's telling us with everything He does in our lives?
5th red light in a row. "Talk to Me about your uncle's hip replacement surgery." The wireless is down most of the evening. "Get off Facebook and your games and study My Word with your brothers and sisters." The dude with the loud diesel truck woke you up before your alarm for the 3rd morning this week. "Spend some time with Me this morning." That really annoying girl interrupted homework time and now she won't shut up. "Talk to her about Me. She needs Me."
Countless opportunities were lost because of my failure to be spiritually attuned to the Holy Spirit's direction and because of my failure to be as committed to getting time with Jesus, the Bridegroom of the Church, as I am about getting time with my husband. I don't stay up late at night to spend time with Him, I don't value His Word like I do Allen's pillow, I don't consider blasting anything or anybody that stands between me and Jesus, I'm not greedy about spending time with Him.
How indescribably sad!